|Deviant Login||Shop||Join deviantART for FREE||Take the Tour|
3:36Each breath so entirely filled with nostalgia,
each inhale filling my lungs with memories of summer months.
1:55Your lips used to meet my neck
and you would tell me stories of the sea
you told me of nights your friends broke bottles on the shore
and I counted the cigarettes you'd put out on the sand
for so long you had worn your heart as close to your sleeve as I
this habit for you was not one so easily escaped
you spoke your altered words and I think perhaps you even considered yourself honest
you lead me with your falsehood and I took faith in your half truths
I made promises to follow you into the dark, into the night
and there in that curtain of the night you told me your heart was no longer my home
We cannot escape the world that others createFor too long now we have been trapped by society. We feel the need to rebel against restrictions set in place. I lie in wait by the corner, sitting on the sidewalk with my legs spread out in front of me. Cigarette in hand, I wonder what my mother would think of me now. My phone violently buzzes through the material of my coat pocket against my bare torso. A blocked number again. Through my limbs I feel my veins pulsate as I recall how I had scaled the side fence earlier that night, how silently I had crept past my parents who kept to the living room. Soon enough I will be eighteen, although, to them this does not matter. To them I must remain to the confines of my room, dressing and acting ‘appropriately’.
By the corner of Gore and Johnston we are now, not too far from the brewery we would explore with such child-like curiosity. I guess there was a greater sense of fun in what we did then, climbing fences for the sake of it and spraying meaningless words on the facades of t
12:10I dream of you still,
of what you were,
of what we were
when we would take each other's picture.
I dream of you,
encapsulated in film grain,
the closest I can be to you now
those images of us climbing fences,
entering empty buildings.
Those bluestone walls,
once so prim, now covered by vines,
just as you crept over me,
marking my skin.
We used to sit up past your bed time,
sharing our first kisses,
my legs would dangle over the skatepark ramps,
and you would pull away, exclaiming 'I'm warm now'.
But never have I met a person so cold.
8:12An obsession of an alternate reality
caused by uncontrolled wanting
of boys who take too many drugs
and look through rose coloured glasses
at the realities of each girl they chose to inflict hurt
I suppose it wasn't too long ago now
that I found myself on the windowsill
hiding from the thickening rain
I cried to you, I hoped for you
but your words were cruel, and you, you were empty
I was sitting on a windowsill
wishing for those initial flirtatious words
wishing for days when we sat in the summer sun,
sharing cigarette kisses and meaningless compliments
I was sitting on a windowsill,
and you tore my heart in two
Now I share your rose glass gaze
hoping for your falsities, your falsehood,
I wish for the kisses and each tree we sat under
our arms wrapped so tight, fearing truths penetration.
7:03A soul sucker, true to form
the kind that hides in midnight shadows,
cigarette in hand
a coat falls from her shoulders
in a way which no arms could
and you are left to wonder,
was it her, over I?
and you are left to wonder,
what streets she'll be wandering tonight
you see, claws cut like daggers
in this dark utopian state of mind
A room filled with a hundred faces,
the ones which pout their lips
and tell you, 'you are gorgeous'
your twilight body vibrates
as strange hands are laid across it
you see, in your mind you know
that it was I, over her
but this is one piece of information
never to be made known
A barefooted girl who runs the streets,
her mind not quite aware of what is yet to come.
7:17such an incredulous manner
the way in which you allow
your body to move by mine
disregarding the credit owed
encased by heat, charged by chemicals
ridden with nostalgia of innocence, naivety
bluestone pathways lead my way
red lights flicker, cigarette packs occupied by drugs
and as once again i feel my skin
touched by the hands of unwanted men
i dream of others, those almost as detached as i
7:56There were times when I walked those streets with such dignity, such pride in who I was, such pride in whose eyes I fell. But the sun reveals itself less often these days, it no longer shows me those starry shadows. I find myself downing all the kinds of medication that get you drunk too fast. I find myself with my head in the toilet bowl, boys with tattoos and stretched ears offering me tea. But most often, I find myself beds. My own bed, beds of friends, beds of boys I once considered 'lovers', boys I could consider 'lovers' once more. I could wrap myself in all the blankets I could find, but still, I do not find the warmth I am searching for. For days at a time I stare at my phone, I wait by my computer screen. I wait for that false interest boys seem to find with me. And these boys watch me down my coffee, watch me inhale each cigarette until I reach my last, they watch the way I am always looking over their shoulder, wondering whats beyond.
And these boys pass me my pills, dropped
24 not-poems later1.
it is so hard to be okay
when all i've got are cigarettes
the voices of strangers
and memories of you
it's so hard to be okay
when you hate yourself
for not being okay
all i want is to hear you say
that you love me
so that for five seconds,
i can believe it;
just a few moments
of being alright
i wonder what you would do
with the letters i have written
but never given you
with the truth that i have known
but never told
if i swim
until my arms could no longer
hold me up - you wouldn't
even have a body to say goodbye to
i wonder what you would do
if i wrote right here
that it was you
i wonder what you would think about
and what we have done; the love
that we have destroyed
with our cowardice and our weakness
like a windowsill plant
left out in summer
i wonder what you would think
if the last thing i tol you
was that i loved you
god damn you kissed me hard
when you left
as if you knew it would be the last time
what if it was
the last time
you would never have to catch another moth for m
PerdicionTe conocí en invierno, las calles cubiertas de nieve, el frió carcomía nuestras pieles,
tu piel pálida y congelada, intentado calentar tus manos.
Ese día, aquel donde sentí un fuerte impulso de hablarte en cuanto te vi, sentado en la banca del parque moviendo tus piernas para entrar en calor, solo guiada por un impulso
me acerque a ti, te di mi bufanda y gantes, luego solo me fui.... sin preguntarte
tu nombre, ni de donde eras, ni que hacías, solo me fui.
Días pasaron, y no te volví a ver, creí que solo fue coincidencia el haberte encontrado para evitar que murieras congelado, pero increíblemente nos reencontramos en mi cafetería favorita, te distinguí de inmediato por que traías puesta mi bufanda y guantes..... aun recuerdo tu rostro confundido ... como si buscases a alguien.
Recuerdo tu rostro iluminarse cuando giraste en mi dirección. Me dijiste que mi bufanda tenia olor a
I Love You.
Oh, gorgeous goddess!
How your beauty tantalizes me!
Leaving a dumb statue
In my place.
How can You,
O Great and Majestic One,
Sitting on your golden throne,
In the sky,
Have created such a girl
As the one I see
Oh how my heart flutters!
Sweet angel, you gave
Wings to my
You blessed a poor soul,
With that wonderful magic
Only you possess.
I will give
I will cross the world for you,
I will serve you,
I will think only of you,
I will do anything for you!
If only I can
Hold your delicate hand,
Skin so smooth,
Soft as silk,
And be with you,
Every step of your way,
To comfort you
In your sorrows,
he's got a girlfriend anywaywe both know
that it's hard to write about
it's taken me seven months to start
while you slept, i burnt your crimson sheets
and painted your ceiling purple
part of me thought you might understand
i was trying to show you how i felt
i was being brave
it was how i wanted to tell you
but i was destroying more than i created
(just spread your love
set fire to the storms)
i tried to tell you
but i was tied to tracks
and it's too close for the train to miss me when it stops
if there is still a chance
you might need me
you will find me where we fell in love
sitting under cherry dark skies
with shaking fingers crossed
and blood stained lips locked
LovesicknessI've only known you for a few days,
Yet still this longing feeling stays.
It makes me hate my in active ways,
I need a distraction, for the longer I laze,
The more I think of how you amaze.
Without your touch I feel so alone,
Anywhere near you could feel like home.
So please let me near, it's my heart that you own!
After all, you said that you love me so dearly,
Do why can't I hug you at least yearly?
you jump i jumpit shouldn't be a crime to want to die
but when it comes to you
i'm so fucking glad it is
A State of Consistent Emptiness“Are you feeling better now?”
I feel I have to lie somehow
But instead truth comes spilling out
Before I cork my mouth
With a never mind,
Save it for another time
When I am open to sharing
I know that it will come someday
A point of self-reflection
And everything so huge
Will get smaller, easier, and less dramatic
But for now I swoon over you in the dead of night
Assisted by the bloodied objects of my plight
And I wonder when that day will come
When there is something I set my sights on
And strive to be it
Floating, falling dangerously
Like a dandelion above water
And like a small child you are the only one
Who actually wants me in their lawn
Who might actually miss me when I’m gone
And sometimes I want to strangle myself
Just to see if I’m worth saving
But still I ignore and consent to drown
I’m better off when I cannot breathe
More in touch when I cannot see
And so I bite your hand away
With my last breath
And then I sink into the abyss
All of my regrets
The girl he loves...
The girl he loves is not perfection.
But the girl he loves doesn't have much depression.
The girl he loves is too talkative.
The girl he loves is crazy and wild.
The girl he loves is much much expressive.
The girl he loves can be over-obsessive.
The girl he loves is pretty but she denies it.
The girl he loves is always laughing and smiling.
The girl he loves can't rhyme or rap.
But the girl he loves is me.
And that's a fact.
FreedThis life has felt sabotaged;
Obliterated; destroyed –
I’ve thought about what’s to come
For the remaining portion,
And dream to keep dreaming.
But ho~! I have found Freedom
In the eyes of Hope.
I feel spoilt with
Joy and redemption –
A conflagration of content.
Despite the things I realise,
Dropping me down lower,
You keep me above the line –
You keep the sanity in,
And the insanity at bay.
I just hope that
One day –
Many days –
I can return
12:18And I think that 4am knows all my secrets,
I think it knows how you once held my waist as you told me secrets of your own,
I think that it knows that when I was lonely I would drink wine and dance under pine trees.
By Friday you smelt like Summer again,
you smelt of the salt kissed air on the nights our feet would trail along train tracks.
You kissed me again like that day in March,
you kissed me as you did when it was nothing but lust, nothing but star-like shadows.
Vanguard, Chapter 1: DuncanDuncan's Journal: Day 1288
I consider myself a good man. I respect women, elders, my equals, and the dead. I say a morning prayer, and an evening one. Hell, I even thank the gods for a meal, instead of immediately chowing down in the voracious manner as the other soldiers here do. By all logical means, I should be in paradise. No really, not just because I'm a good man, but also because I should be dead by now. So I ask myself: why, oh gods up there, have I ended up in hell?
1288 days. 1288 days of my life have been spent in this misery, and I'm beginning to lose faith in the glory I was promised. Some of the rookies still live in their ignorant bliss, but I've lived long enough to realize that there's not much glory to find here. “Sing the songs of glory and march into battle—-join The Crusade today!”. Such were the words of the posters The Crusade has spread all over The Mortal Realm. Gullible fools practically stand in line for these songs of glory that th
LatreuophobiaI wash off sick-sweet orange lipstick in front of a mirror as dusty as gothic romances. It tastes like oblivion, that is to say, like nothing my tongue can detect.
The door opens with a creak no private restroom could emulate. Some chick with blue bobbed hair and smeared eyeliner. I looked like that once. Ten years ago.
Getting the beer out of my hair is harder. Some men just can't take it when I'd rather they not kiss my feet or call me an angel or-
“Dayum girl, you look like a goddess.”
I gulp, taste of acid.
Keep in Touch!
^Nyx-Valentine arrived in our community and started whipping everyone into a frenzy with her relentless desire to bring the Artistic Nude and Fetish galleries to the fore. 9 years later, and it's safe to say that Nyx is not only a leader as a photographer in these galleries, but she has also established herself as a much saught after model. ^... Read More