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3:36Each breath so entirely filled with nostalgia,
each inhale filling my lungs with memories of summer months.
1:55Your lips used to meet my neck
and you would tell me stories of the sea
you told me of nights your friends broke bottles on the shore
and I counted the cigarettes you'd put out on the sand
for so long you had worn your heart as close to your sleeve as I
this habit for you was not one so easily escaped
you spoke your altered words and I think perhaps you even considered yourself honest
you lead me with your falsehood and I took faith in your half truths
I made promises to follow you into the dark, into the night
and there in that curtain of the night you told me your heart was no longer my home
We cannot escape the world that others createFor too long now we have been trapped by society. We feel the need to rebel against restrictions set in place. I lie in wait by the corner, sitting on the sidewalk with my legs spread out in front of me. Cigarette in hand, I wonder what my mother would think of me now. My phone violently buzzes through the material of my coat pocket against my bare torso. A blocked number again. Through my limbs I feel my veins pulsate as I recall how I had scaled the side fence earlier that night, how silently I had crept past my parents who kept to the living room. Soon enough I will be eighteen, although, to them this does not matter. To them I must remain to the confines of my room, dressing and acting ‘appropriately’.
By the corner of Gore and Johnston we are now, not too far from the brewery we would explore with such child-like curiosity. I guess there was a greater sense of fun in what we did then, climbing fences for the sake of it and spraying meaningless words on the facades of t
12:10I dream of you still,
of what you were,
of what we were
when we would take each other's picture.
I dream of you,
encapsulated in film grain,
the closest I can be to you now
those images of us climbing fences,
entering empty buildings.
Those bluestone walls,
once so prim, now covered by vines,
just as you crept over me,
marking my skin.
We used to sit up past your bed time,
sharing our first kisses,
my legs would dangle over the skatepark ramps,
and you would pull away, exclaiming 'I'm warm now'.
But never have I met a person so cold.
8:12An obsession of an alternate reality
caused by uncontrolled wanting
of boys who take too many drugs
and look through rose coloured glasses
at the realities of each girl they chose to inflict hurt
I suppose it wasn't too long ago now
that I found myself on the windowsill
hiding from the thickening rain
I cried to you, I hoped for you
but your words were cruel, and you, you were empty
I was sitting on a windowsill
wishing for those initial flirtatious words
wishing for days when we sat in the summer sun,
sharing cigarette kisses and meaningless compliments
I was sitting on a windowsill,
and you tore my heart in two
Now I share your rose glass gaze
hoping for your falsities, your falsehood,
I wish for the kisses and each tree we sat under
our arms wrapped so tight, fearing truths penetration.
7:03A soul sucker, true to form
the kind that hides in midnight shadows,
cigarette in hand
a coat falls from her shoulders
in a way which no arms could
and you are left to wonder,
was it her, over I?
and you are left to wonder,
what streets she'll be wandering tonight
you see, claws cut like daggers
in this dark utopian state of mind
A room filled with a hundred faces,
the ones which pout their lips
and tell you, 'you are gorgeous'
your twilight body vibrates
as strange hands are laid across it
you see, in your mind you know
that it was I, over her
but this is one piece of information
never to be made known
A barefooted girl who runs the streets,
her mind not quite aware of what is yet to come.
7:17such an incredulous manner
the way in which you allow
your body to move by mine
disregarding the credit owed
encased by heat, charged by chemicals
ridden with nostalgia of innocence, naivety
bluestone pathways lead my way
red lights flicker, cigarette packs occupied by drugs
and as once again i feel my skin
touched by the hands of unwanted men
i dream of others, those almost as detached as i
7:56There were times when I walked those streets with such dignity, such pride in who I was, such pride in whose eyes I fell. But the sun reveals itself less often these days, it no longer shows me those starry shadows. I find myself downing all the kinds of medication that get you drunk too fast. I find myself with my head in the toilet bowl, boys with tattoos and stretched ears offering me tea. But most often, I find myself beds. My own bed, beds of friends, beds of boys I once considered 'lovers', boys I could consider 'lovers' once more. I could wrap myself in all the blankets I could find, but still, I do not find the warmth I am searching for. For days at a time I stare at my phone, I wait by my computer screen. I wait for that false interest boys seem to find with me. And these boys watch me down my coffee, watch me inhale each cigarette until I reach my last, they watch the way I am always looking over their shoulder, wondering whats beyond.
And these boys pass me my pills, dropped
Mermaid's Monologue For LoveI'm floating over where I should be standing
Fins are what I have, no feet for demanding
I dream about being touched upon my shoulders
As you let me know you are there
Why do I dream of love at such a young age?
Blush marks appear on my face
As I daydream about what you would provide for me
Embracing myself with arms crossing my waist
If only I could have a taste
Of the possible good things you may offer
For our relationship~
My hair tosses about in the oceans waves
The wind the earth would receive is different
Underneath the dirt and trees
My brown eyes filled with enthusiastic hope
My heart beats as if you've already arrived
Yet that is not so unto my eyes
As I hug myself, I picture you near me
My eyes close for sleepiness and wanting you
Wanting my love near my side
Before the Earth collects the ocean's tide
Blush marks redden more than usual
I open my eyes as I gaze at the moon
Before I drift off to sleep
To ease my high school conscience
Are you there to kiss my troubles each
Today's HoroscopeA tender smile forms upon his lips
as I laugh, trying to get the hair
out of my face.
He perks in enjoyment as I ask for help,
needing him to fix my seemingly
never ending predicaments.
All I notice when the sun blinds him
is the green specks that appear
with the brown nothingness in his eyes.
When we sing as a group,
I can hear his baritone sink in
even if he's miles away.
We've both been lonely a while,
I with empty promises and
he with absolutely nothing. Hopefully,
God will smile upon this friendship,
that Today's Horoscope said would
your namethree months from now, i'll look back on this and think
"i can't believe i ever wrote your name on my desk."
but until then, i'll keep scratching it in,
over and over,
until it makes a dent,
in my heart.
YouMy breaths will go, but I'll never let go of you,
You're the reason I live, you're the reason I flew,
I flew through my dreams and came to you,
You opened your arms and welcomed me too.
My eyesight will go, but I'll never stop looking at you,
You're the reason I smile, you're the reason I say,
You're the best thing for me, you're my drug for every day,
Life without you, is like the world blocked from the sun ray.
My senses will go, but I'll never stop hugging you,
You're the reason I'm warm, in your arms you cuddle me through,
Through the pain and hardships I had to bare,
Life without you here, is heartless in despair.
My soul will go, but I'll always be with you,
Right beside you, in your life's journey too,
Don't forget me, I have a piece of your heart,
I've attached it to mine, it's been there right from the start.
My Try At RomanceRoses are red
Violets are blue
What a wonderful smile
God drew for you
My blood is red
But on the inside blue
As your heart beat
My love only grew
Your blush is red
My eyes are blue
With a flash that
Gentle hue, my worries flew
Our lips are red
The sky is blue
Together with you
I feel not one pulse...
Brown Eyes Aren't BoringThe cigarette fog is clearing out
And all I see are unhappy people
So many unhappy people.
This weight is pulling me down.
Rest my head.
Baby all I see are those brown eyes.
Twinkling in this sunlight.
I never seen such beautiful eyes.
Break the Mold09-12-14
Break the mold,
I want to be told,
"I'll be the one that you'll hold,"
For I no longer want to be cold...
ForeverI know we can't be together now,
But I know we will be one day.
One day, we will be together.
Neither of us care how long we must wait,
For it will be well worth the wait.
Even if I must wait an eternity,
I will wait for you.
Nothing will stop me from doing so.
Even if I am unable to talk to you,
I will find the right moment to tell you,
As many times as I have to,
How much I love you and how much you mean to me.
Forever I will wait,
Until we can truly be together.
At a time where no one can and/or will look down at us.
You mean more to me than I can even imagine.
My hand continue to be held out,
So that you can hold it
When we finally can be together.
One day, we will truly be together.
I feel at home and cozy and warm and loved and--
I could go on and on and on and on and on--
I can feel my heart beating and warming my chest but--
No butterflies in my stomach just the fluttering of my heart when I--
I can feel my breath being taken away every time I--
When I'm with you
12:18And I think that 4am knows all my secrets,
I think it knows how you once held my waist as you told me secrets of your own,
I think that it knows that when I was lonely I would drink wine and dance under pine trees.
By Friday you smelt like Summer again,
you smelt of the salt kissed air on the nights our feet would trail along train tracks.
You kissed me again like that day in March,
you kissed me as you did when it was nothing but lust, nothing but star-like shadows.
IowaIf you visit Iowa,
you'll call her fields empty,
but she wasn't born that way.
A part of her was carved out
when she was ripped between Virginia
and the purple mountains of New Mexico.
Her gold hair, she tore it out when she realized
it didn't make her a princess.
She laid her locks strung along every road
leading somewhere else.
White hairs on her cheeks
are scars from winter.
Her hair darkens with the dampness
of summer rains.
The storms are never silent,
but neither is life when there's a tear
in your childhood where
a parent ought to be.
I've been flooded by Iowa's sorrow.
The only way I can distract her from her own voided landscape
is if I hate myself harder than she cries.
She just wants to fly
and I want to bus or train,
not because I fear death, but because
I want to take living slow.
It's the only way I ever feel.
From the air it's hard to watch Earth's hips move.
But Earth can't compare to the country.
That's my girl.
Full grown even when harvesting season's j
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scheinbar is a much-loved and well-known deviant. Just one look at her gallery, filled with enchanting photography, will have you mesmerized. A deviant for over 7 years, Christiane can always be found posting inspirational features as well as regularly commenting on other deviations and encouraging and empowering her fellow deviants. We are inspired and insist that you too stop by and congratulate ... Read More