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3:36Each breath so entirely filled with nostalgia,
each inhale filling my lungs with memories of summer months.
1:55Your lips used to meet my neck
and you would tell me stories of the sea
you told me of nights your friends broke bottles on the shore
and I counted the cigarettes you'd put out on the sand
for so long you had worn your heart as close to your sleeve as I
this habit for you was not one so easily escaped
you spoke your altered words and I think perhaps you even considered yourself honest
you lead me with your falsehood and I took faith in your half truths
I made promises to follow you into the dark, into the night
and there in that curtain of the night you told me your heart was no longer my home
We cannot escape the world that others createFor too long now we have been trapped by society. We feel the need to rebel against restrictions set in place. I lie in wait by the corner, sitting on the sidewalk with my legs spread out in front of me. Cigarette in hand, I wonder what my mother would think of me now. My phone violently buzzes through the material of my coat pocket against my bare torso. A blocked number again. Through my limbs I feel my veins pulsate as I recall how I had scaled the side fence earlier that night, how silently I had crept past my parents who kept to the living room. Soon enough I will be eighteen, although, to them this does not matter. To them I must remain to the confines of my room, dressing and acting ‘appropriately’.
By the corner of Gore and Johnston we are now, not too far from the brewery we would explore with such child-like curiosity. I guess there was a greater sense of fun in what we did then, climbing fences for the sake of it and spraying meaningless words on the facades of t
12:10I dream of you still,
of what you were,
of what we were
when we would take each other's picture.
I dream of you,
encapsulated in film grain,
the closest I can be to you now
those images of us climbing fences,
entering empty buildings.
Those bluestone walls,
once so prim, now covered by vines,
just as you crept over me,
marking my skin.
We used to sit up past your bed time,
sharing our first kisses,
my legs would dangle over the skatepark ramps,
and you would pull away, exclaiming 'I'm warm now'.
But never have I met a person so cold.
8:12An obsession of an alternate reality
caused by uncontrolled wanting
of boys who take too many drugs
and look through rose coloured glasses
at the realities of each girl they chose to inflict hurt
I suppose it wasn't too long ago now
that I found myself on the windowsill
hiding from the thickening rain
I cried to you, I hoped for you
but your words were cruel, and you, you were empty
I was sitting on a windowsill
wishing for those initial flirtatious words
wishing for days when we sat in the summer sun,
sharing cigarette kisses and meaningless compliments
I was sitting on a windowsill,
and you tore my heart in two
Now I share your rose glass gaze
hoping for your falsities, your falsehood,
I wish for the kisses and each tree we sat under
our arms wrapped so tight, fearing truths penetration.
7:03A soul sucker, true to form
the kind that hides in midnight shadows,
cigarette in hand
a coat falls from her shoulders
in a way which no arms could
and you are left to wonder,
was it her, over I?
and you are left to wonder,
what streets she'll be wandering tonight
you see, claws cut like daggers
in this dark utopian state of mind
A room filled with a hundred faces,
the ones which pout their lips
and tell you, 'you are gorgeous'
your twilight body vibrates
as strange hands are laid across it
you see, in your mind you know
that it was I, over her
but this is one piece of information
never to be made known
A barefooted girl who runs the streets,
her mind not quite aware of what is yet to come.
7:17such an incredulous manner
the way in which you allow
your body to move by mine
disregarding the credit owed
encased by heat, charged by chemicals
ridden with nostalgia of innocence, naivety
bluestone pathways lead my way
red lights flicker, cigarette packs occupied by drugs
and as once again i feel my skin
touched by the hands of unwanted men
i dream of others, those almost as detached as i
7:56There were times when I walked those streets with such dignity, such pride in who I was, such pride in whose eyes I fell. But the sun reveals itself less often these days, it no longer shows me those starry shadows. I find myself downing all the kinds of medication that get you drunk too fast. I find myself with my head in the toilet bowl, boys with tattoos and stretched ears offering me tea. But most often, I find myself beds. My own bed, beds of friends, beds of boys I once considered 'lovers', boys I could consider 'lovers' once more. I could wrap myself in all the blankets I could find, but still, I do not find the warmth I am searching for. For days at a time I stare at my phone, I wait by my computer screen. I wait for that false interest boys seem to find with me. And these boys watch me down my coffee, watch me inhale each cigarette until I reach my last, they watch the way I am always looking over their shoulder, wondering whats beyond.
And these boys pass me my pills, dropped
dreamstatecandles shiver, too bright to brave
fading into night and their delicate
pin tip wicks flicker-flash,
dancing in the ocean-tide winds
betraying the presence of
your ghostly breath
you sneak in like a whisper
(you didn’t use to be so quiet)
but now you tip-toe, weaving fog across
mirror edges in my mind and
you are just a moment
past midnight; three (strike.. strike.. strike..)
it is too late to resurrect you
the love-linger of your warm skin
atop mine or revive our
skewed dependent cycle of your
breath in my crushed rose lungs or relive
memories more faded than
darling, it is too late, let me sleep;
I’ll dream of you anyways
A mystery for twoLet me put my words away
I want to express myself
To speak in a a way only you can understand
Just trust me
The more I yell the less you'll hear
And these matters - well, I do believe they ought to be crystal clear
Believe me, silence is the key
Now close your eyes and reach for me
No, do not touch me
Just be close and fell the heat
Count the tic-tac of my irregular heartbeat
Really, words tend to get in the way
I say this, you think that - we go separate ways
Let's keep things simple
I'll avoid your gaze
You're too amazing for me to keep up
Call me shy or call me crazy
There's one more secret I'd like to share with you
I hope I made you feel like you're special
If you focus you'll find a connection
If you don't trust me or don't believe me, you will see
These things I've never said or did - for you from me
Beautiful Constellation (The Fault In Our Stars)And this has nothing to do
Though you feel like one to me
And I know nothing is really "okay"
But saying it makes me feel infinite
Belongs to us
Though it never really did
And though you are out of touch
You are mine all the same
I would dare to let death go
Though you say it's inevitable
And I always imagined a perfect ending
But perfect does not exist
And my thoughts are stars I can't fathom into constellations
Because nothing makes sense to me
And even "us" doesn't make sense to me
Death doesn't make sense to me
It's all a broken reverie
But I still love you
You are my angel
Though this is not really about angels
Because angels come and go
You are here with me in this infinite moment
And we will both die shortly
Death is only waiting for us to give up
And we both have nothing
But the fault in our stars
And the fault in our stars
Does not exist
Though some say
That it is hardly ever our fate that makes us underlings,
YouYou are my why
You are why I want to be here
You are why I love this place
And every day when i see your face
You brighten each day
When you say hello to me
But I cant tell you
How could I tell you
Just what you mean to me
But I cant just leave it be
So I write this for you
With all my sad and sorrow
With hope that tomorrow
My heart wont ache
And my heart wont cry
That this longing will be gone
So my soul can rest once more
But it wont work
Because without you, I'm lost
Without you,I'm like a cold frost
But with you here
I have nothing to fear
And I hate to say it
Because then it's true
I love you.
TouchI don't want to get used to the words you whisper in my ear
Or breathlessly sigh into my mouth
I don't want to get used to the touches that you give me when sun hasn't rised yet
And the touches you give me just before I fall asleep
I want it so my cheeks blush either bright red or turn pale in the cold air
So that my hair flies in the unforgiving wind and passionate fire burns my skin
So that I never forget what your true love feels like
And how much damage your anger can do to my soul
I want you so badly to suprise me like you did that cold morning
Planting kisses like flowers on my cheeks
And carrying me through the colorful meadows for two hours
I don't want to get used to you.
Home is Wherever I'm With YouThumping hearts speaking in the silence of the night,
Your skin tingles under my fingertips
And I feel at home.
Twirling a soft, midnight strand of your hair,
Your gentle eyes illuminate a song of happiness
Breathing my words of devotion in your ear to you and only you,
I feel at home.
Protecting you from the thorns of life,
Convincing you that you shine brighter than any star in God’s sky,
I feel so alive with you by my side.
Invested in you and only you,
I feel the warmth of your body in my embrace,
And I’m home.
Sunlight VS. ShadowsDarling,
I love you
I love the way you laugh
When I say something funny without trying
The way you smile
Although you don't do that often
The way you try to romance me
With those silly, adorable pickup lines
You always seem to make me blush
You always have a way to make me smile
But now you have her...
Another girl you really like
Another sun to light up your world
Is her sunlight brighter than mine?
Is my light fading on you?
But I'm happy for you
I really am...
I'm glad you have someone to make you smile
I'm happy someone can make you laugh more than I do
I wish you good luck
I'll wish upon that shooting star
For you to have a better life
With that girl who will actually be there for you
I'm better sinking into the shadows
Shall I just move on?
Shall I fade into the night?
Where I will be hidden forever?
It's not like I have a chance
Or anyone else
So please, my love
Will you answer these questions for me?
Shall I leave or stay?
Shall I move on with the feelings
EverlastingWe met one day in a place that none would think of
In a way that would seem impossible
People don't see how it doesn't matter
How we grew to enjoy the other.
The laughter, the joy of hearing the other,
Waiting for one to come
To vast in the atmosphere that was brought,
Having this feeling of love.
Can anyone put down this feeling?
Will it continue to not be accepted?
Danger and pain lurks with every turn
Waiting, ready to strike at any given moment.
How deep and strong is that feeling?
Much could be said of what is wrong with this
That this won't last long that
This was all some prank or joke from the start!
...I don't believe that,
Despite how others continue to see it
I don't see this to be that
Even if it could be wrong or simple not right.
I am happy
His presence and being brings me joy
The way he teases
His persistent nature and perverse actions
All of it is who he is,
The one that shows his true feelings,
Ones that I can see truth in
For liars are easy to pick up on.
12:18And I think that 4am knows all my secrets,
I think it knows how you once held my waist as you told me secrets of your own,
I think that it knows that when I was lonely I would drink wine and dance under pine trees.
By Friday you smelt like Summer again,
you smelt of the salt kissed air on the nights our feet would trail along train tracks.
You kissed me again like that day in March,
you kissed me as you did when it was nothing but lust, nothing but star-like shadows.
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Bluefley has a gallery filled with artwork that whisks you off in to a Sci-fi daydream, and keeps you captivated for hours. Marc has been a member of our community for over a decade and has achieved nothing but success with his astounding commitment to interacting with the community, sharing a prolific amount of video tutorials and generally being an all round rockstar deviant. It is no joke that we are absolutely delighted to award the Deviousness Award for April 2014 to ... Read More